I have always been fascinated with the idea of women succumbing to the thrall of an intrinsically evil creature such as a vampire. It seems no matter her upbringing, ideals, inhibitions and/or sexual hang-ups the vampire can bend anyone to his will. Well, maybe not Buffy. Of course, it’s a no-brainer to blame the vampire. I mean, he is doing that hypno-erotic-enthrallment-thingy that always gets the gal no matter how much of a tight-a$$ she appears to be. Nevertheless, after much thought, coffee, and bags of Hershey Kisses, I refuse to buy into that lame excuse anymore. Extensive research (by a couple friends and me) confirms not everyone is subject to hypnosis (especially Jackie, who is still watching Days of Our Lives, despite repeated trips to Dr. Bobbie at the strip mall). Yet, that is what ol’ Drac is doing—slight of hand, eyeball, whatever. So, what is really at work here? Read on, and I will be glad to impart my theory, and then you decide for yourself. All right, consider this–you are on a first date, and super-hunky Rafe/Colin/Antony, takes you out to dinner, clubbing, maybe a movie, or perhaps all three. He does everything right and you find the evening enjoyable. Then it’s time for the good night kiss—he lays one on you, puts everything into it, and manages to caress your tonsils with his tongue. Unfortunately, the chemistry is more a sputter than a sizzle. However, Mr. Hunky thinks it’s all good and asks for a second date. You let the man down easy with the I-want-to-stay-friends-let’s-go-to-lunch-sometime rhetoric slam the door in his face and decide a bottle of wine, Mr. Personal Massager, and thou, is the only constant in a substandard dating-life.
Of course, Hunky-Joe can’t take the rejection and begins shadowing your every move. One night after weeks of stalking you, he appears outside your bedroom window…at midnight…scratching his longish fingernails (ewww) on the glass demanding entrance. He insists he is your eternal lover completely convinced you return his affections, and if that doesn’t wilt your curls, he soon expresses a burning desire to sex you up, while draining your carotid artery. Now, be honest, how would you react? You’d wear down the heels on your favorite stilettos doing a Carl Lewis all the way to the cop shop demanding twenty-four hour protection, a restraining order against the nut-job, and only after you purchased a nine millimeter Beretta with a back-up clip, and a German Shepard named Kills-Many, who responds to the attack command in several languages to include Lakota. Given the above, why would this same scenario prove irresistible with a vampire-type as the culprit? Here is my theory, and really, I can only speak for myself. If a sinfully sexy, cultured, wealthy, ageless, master-of-seduction decided his only requirement was moi, naked, and willing then I would have to say let the games begin! (No, Eric, no enthrallment necessary, no need to break a sweat babes, I’ll go with you willingly. Want me to drive? Hey, you coming or what?) Additionally, a vampire has a lot more than those four fabulous factors working in his favor. Most important, he comes without the bothersome, and sometimes oinkish qualities of the human male. Let’s face it, Dracula/Eric/Bill isn’t going to drop his dirty underwear on the bedroom floor within inches of the clothes hamper, or adjust his package in public. I’ve yet to read a book, or watch a movie where a vampire empties his pockets leaving coins, crumpled bills, gum wrappers, gas receipts, movie stubs, and wads of lint strewn over every available surface in the house possibly after swigging a beer, and/or burping open a door.Regrettably, most folklore/myths cast vampires like Eric Northman into nefarious roles. Admittedly, blood-exchanges, M/s relationships, as well as sexual obsession might drive a person insane (though the jury is still out on that last one). Still, as I ponder what to prepare for supper, fold my second basket of laundry, pick up after my husband, daughter, and two dogs, I have to ask myself this; really, how bad could insanity be?www.MarieMarch.comI have traveled the world, lived on two continents, and in eleven cities. I have met my childhood hero. I have worn a uniform during wartime, and flown an airplane. Two crazy cattle dogs, both of which I rescued from puppy prison, own me. Currently, I am living in the Midwest, but will be moving to Europe in the fall of 2010. Transylvania here I come! You can buy Marie’s e-books at Whispers Publishing, Red Rose Publishing, eXcessica publishing