My name is Zoey Jones and I have one of the most dangerous predators in the galaxy after me. Why? I’m a powerful psychic. With my rather awesome mental shields, I’ve managed to fool everyone I know, even my father into thinking I’m a normal human. Unfortunately, one persistent Coletti Warlord isn’t buying it. Who knew drop dead gorgeous was the face of my enemy?
How did all this start? It started with them. In 2015 something nasty found our world. They call themselves the Tai-Kok. They are malevolent, depraved ghouls who live to eat. The image of these tall, hairless, skeletal humanoids with a mouth full of sharp metal teeth is forever burned into the minds of every man, woman and child left on Earth. Completing the nightmare are their three blood-red eyes that glare out of skin so transparent you can watch as your loved ones are being digested.
No one knows how they found our world or why they consider us good eating. The few peace delegates that tried to communicate with them got butchered. After that, everyone was too busy running for their lives to find out why.
The one good thing that resulted from the monster’s attacks was it unified humanity. For the first time in recorded history every country on Earth joined forces to fight the alien invaders and Central Command was born.
The Tai-Kok ate their way across Europe and the Middle East until they had the bad luck to capture a suicide bomber and take him aboard their ship for snack time. He blew himself up over the Pacific. Luckily, the ship crashed outside of Tucson, Arizona. We salvaged their technology and have been using it against them ever since.
Four years ago my cousin, Kaylee Jones, mated with a Coletti Warlord which proved to be a mixed blessing. The Coletti and their allies now protect Earth from Tai-Kok and Rodan raiders but this protection came with a price. They demanded we turn over all psychic women to them. Seems they need us as breeding stock.
Why you ask? Six hundred years ago the Coletti race had almost been wiped out in the Great Galactic War. Unfortunately for the females of the universe, chemicals used in the war created a genetic anomaly and only one female baby was born for every one thousand males. The Coletti women were going the way of the Dodo bird.
Facing extinction, the Coletti Warlords started raiding other planets and species for their prized psychic women. Once Zarek, the Overlord of the Coletti clans, discovered the Jones family’s unique psychic powers and our blood’s ability to heal cellular damage, he promptly seized control of Earth. Any woman who displayed psychic capability was immediately taken to their home world to be converted. Didn’t that sound like fun? My awesome mental shields are the only thing keeping me from being turned into a brood mare.
My Mother was a Pulitzer prize winning reporter and had obtained information about three high ranking military men who were aiding the Tai-Kok and Rodan. These traitors were giving the Tai-Kok the codes to shut down our planetary defense systems, allowing them to swoop in and slaughter thousands of people. Seems human flesh is considered a delicacy and sold for a fortune at their version of supermarkets.
Mom was in Tucson following up on a promising lead when I felt her die. I soon discovered that her death wasn’t an accident like everyone claimed. It was murder. Mom had gotten too close and the traitors had silenced her. Those murderous bastards had made one fatal mistake. They thought I wasn’t a threat. Now to find her killer, I must risk it all.
Warlords are persistent buggers and Voss was determined to make me his mate. I was equally determined it was never going to happen. When my clever disguises, skunk perfume, stun gun, smoke bombs and tranquillizer darts failed to stop him, I was forced to negotiate my surrender. I would willingly agreed to mate with him, if he would help me find my Mother’s killer. To my surprise, he agreed. We soon discovered that Malik, the deadliest villain in the galaxy, was behind her death. Our quest to bring him to justice leads to unlikely alliances in an interplanetary war.
The world snapped backed into focus. Oh my God! I yanked on the steering wheel, but it was too late. With a teeth-rattling crash the truck barreled through the side of a large metal hen house and slammed into a section of cages, knocking them over.
The semi shuddered and died. Steam spewed from the hood. Dozens of broken conveyor belts dumped feed, eggs, and chicken poop on the concrete floor.
The cages swayed and toppled over. Thousands of frightened chickens flew about wildly and their squawking was deafening. A blizzard of feathers filled the air, making it hard to see.
The Battle Commander demanded, “Are you injured?”
I shook my head to clear it and a number of bruises immediately made themselves known. “I’m good. Did you get free?”
“Yes.” The cold fury in his voice made me shudder. “You ever engage Malik in battle again I will personally lock you up with the breeders until you learn the proper obedience.”
“I was saving your ungrateful ass.”
“He could have killed you.”
“Well he didn’t.”
“Only because Malik realized his attacker was female and a Siren. Now he hunts you.”
“But… I’m already mated to you.”
“He will use you as a breeder.”
Didn’t that sound like fun?
My radar screamed a warning and I ducked down. Bullets shattered the windshield. “Could we finish this little pep talk later? I kinda stirred up a hornet’s nest.”
“Indeed.” Voss’s battle cry sounded and two thugs flew by the truck and hit the wall with a loud splat.
Okeydokey, the big guy was in a bit of a snit. Shit, who was I kidding? It was more like a towering rage. It was probably a good idea to get the hell out of Dodge and let him cool down a bit. Lock me up with the breeders, my ass.
Throwing open the driver’s door, I scrambled from the truck and yelped in surprise when someone grabbed me around the waist.
“Gotcha!” A male voice crowed.
I rammed my elbow into his nose, and there was a satisfying crunching noise.
“Fucking A, you broke my nose!” the guy cried.
I twisted around gave him a stiff fingered shot to the throat.
The tattooed thug made a funny gasping sound and fell backwards, pulling me down with him.
We landed hard on a crate. I slipped out of his grip and dropped to the floor.
The thug jumped on my back, smashing me face first into the egg-covered cement.
Grabbing a freaked out chicken, I whacked the thug in the face with it. “Cocka-doodle-doo asshole.”
Baaakkk! The chicken went psycho and began pecking the living shit out of the goon. He shrieked like a little girl.
I scrabbled backwards, desperately trying to get to my feet but several thousand eggs had turned the hen house floor into a slippery, gooey mess.
“I’m gonna fucking kill you!” the thug screamed, lunging for me with the chicken riding his head.
“Not today.” My steel-toed boot slammed into his face. His head snapped back and he toppled over, out cold.
The chicken kept on pecking him.
“You go girl.” Slipping and sliding on the broken eggs, I grabbed hold of the cages and pulled myself upright.
The Battle Commander was fighting four Tai-Kok warriors at the same time with his hands still cuffed in front of him and doing some serious damage. Color me impressed.
Using the cages as a ladder I climbed up to the catwalk for a better view. Should I shoot the Tai-Kok or let Voss work out all that aggression? He seemed to be enjoying himself.
Fire ants danced across my mind. A sneaky Tai-Kok slithered around the cages and pointed his weapon at Voss.
A cold rage rolling over me, I pulled my Glock and shot him in the third eye.
Voss broke one warrior’s neck, head-butted another, and delivered a spinning side kick to the third, knocking him into the fourth Tai-Kok.
“I need your knife,” Voss said.
I pulled it and hurled it at him.
He snatched the knife mid-air, stabbed two warriors in the eye, and slit the other one’s throat.
The big, bad Warlord had killed all of them in less than thirty seconds. He made Batman look like a wuss.
A loud clank caught my attention.
A visibly frightened El Jefe climbed out of a metal hatch set in the floor and ran for an open bay door.
Oh hell no. That murdering asshole wasn’t getting away. I sprinted down the catwalk after him, batting frenzied fowls out of my way. Grabbing a pulley chain, I swung off the catwalk doing a great imitation of Tarzan and dropped on El Jefe.
The breath oofed out of El Jefe as my hundred-and-twenty-pound body knocked him flat.
Straddling his back, I grabbed a handful of hair and pounded his head against the asphalt. “You murdered my mother and for what? So you could make a few bucks off of feeding your own people to those monsters. You’re a dead man. Do you hear me?”
His muscles bunched beneath me and to my utter surprise El Jefe reared up like some rodeo bronco twisting, turning, and doing everything he could to throw me off his back. “Perra estupida.”
“I may be a bitch but stupid I’m not.” Wrapping my legs around his waist, I put him in a chokehold and squeezed with all my might. Around and around and around we went.
Voss stepped out of the chicken house and an eyebrow rose in disbelief. “What are you doing?”
“I’m trying to choke him out but it’s harder than I thought. I mean it always looked easy on television.”
The Battle Commander rubbed a hand over his battered face, and I got the impression he was trying not to laugh. I felt his mind lash out.
El Jefe suddenly collapsed to the ground in a boneless heap.
“Thanks, but I could have taken him,” I groused, wiggling out from under him.
Please tell us a little bit about your current project.
Vexing Voss is an erotic/science fiction romp with a sense of humor.
Voss, a fierce Coletti warlord and master of psychic seduction, is determined to make Zoey his mate. She’s equally determined it’s never going to happen. When her clever disguises, skunk perfume, stun gun, smoke bombs, and tranquillizer darts failed to stop him, she was forced to negotiate her surrender. Zoey would willingly agreed to mate with him, if he would help her find her Mother’s killer. To Zoey’s surprise, Voss agreed. Together they soon discovered that Malik, the deadliest villain in the galaxy, was behind her death. Their quest to bring him to justice leads to unlikely alliances in an interplanetary war.
When was the moment that you knew you had to be a writer?
I was a 9-1-1 dispatcher for the Glendale Police Department and to keep from going totally bonkers – I mean people have no idea of what a real emergency is. Take this for an example: I answered, “9-1-1 emergency, what’s your emergency?” And this hysterical woman yelled, “My bird is in a tree.” Sometimes I really couldn’t help myself, so I said, “Birds have a tendency to do that, ma’am.” The woman screeched, “No! You don’t understand. My pet parakeet is in the tree. I’ve just got to get him down.” Like I said, not a clue. “I’m sorry ma’am, but we don’t get birds out of trees.” The woman then cried, “But… What about my husband? He’s up there, too.” See what I had to deal with? To keep from hitting myself repeatedly in the head with my phone, I took up writing.
Who gave you the one piece of writing advice that sticks with you to this day?
My friend Carol. She said never, ever give up. We all get stacks and stacks of rejection letters. Don’t let them stop you. Persistence is the name of the game. Write what you love, and you will be published. Once you’re published you have to market, market, market your work.
Describe the “perfect” hero. What about the “perfect” hero for you?
For my books the perfect hero is tall, dark, and deadly. They’re the ultimate predator and lover. My perfect hero is my Dad. He was honest, hard-working, and generous. My father always had a garden, and would share his “abundance” with those in need. He’d even chop wood for their elderly neighbors. He took care of my mother who suffered from dementia, and never complained about how tough that duty became. Dad passed this May, and he took a part of my heart with him.
What has been your biggest adventure to date?
I made the big mistake of taking the train from Nogales to Mazatlan, Mexico. Hey, it was cheap. Really cheap, and I soon found out why. The toilet was the pull down kind. No privacy at all. If you needed to go, you pulled the sucker out of the wall and did your business with everyone in the compartment watching. Yeah, like that was going to happen. I’m proud to say I held it for twelve hours straight. Okay, I kept my legs crossed and prayed a lot.
The sleeping berths faced the front of the train. Every time it stopped you fell out of bed. They made a lot of stops. By the time we arrived in Mazatlan, I’m sleep deprived and really, really needed to pee. I rushed for the door, eager to find a real bathroom, and found myself face to face with a big Hispanic dude. I eyed his scruffy unshaven face, filthy, sweat stained yellow shirt, and his big ass rifle in horror. Holy guacamole, a bandito, and we’re about to be robbed. No, I did not pee my pants, but it was close. The guy turned out to be El Policia or as us Americans like to say a cop. He wanted to know if we had any drugs. I pulled out a bottle of aspirin and handed it to him. He was not amused.
How do you describe yourself? How would your family and friends describe you?
After all those years at the police department? Mostly normal. Other than an addiction to chocolate, and that twitch in my left eye, I’m good. Okay, I do talk to myself, but it’s a dispatcher thing. No, it’s not a sign of insanity.
My family and friends think I’m a bit of a pervert. Why? If I need to write a really hot sex, scene all I need to do is go out in my backyard and wait. My neighbor and his current girlfriend are pretty frisky in the pool. Their screams get every dog in the neighborhood howling, and I can pick up some pointers from their unusually athletic sexual positions. No, I am not a Peeping Tom. It’s called research.
What project are you working on next?
Reality Bites, the next in the Coletti Warlord series. Bree’s one tough cookie. Can she defeat Jaylan, the Overlord’s best hunter or will she succumb to his mental seduction?
Bio: I was a 9-1-1 dispatcher for thirty-one years and to keep insanity at bay, I took up writing. Not to worry. The insanity isn’t catching – much. Other than the addiction to chocolate and the twitch in my left eye, I’m good. I’ve had my weird but true stories published in newspapers and magazines.
SCAVENGER HUNT CONTEST
WIN A $25 GIFT CARD WITH THE VEXING VOSS SCAVENGER HUNT:
To celebrate the release of Vexing Voss, the next in the Coletti Warlord series by Loose Id, I am running a scavenger hunt. Answer some simple questions correctly and you are entered to win a $25 Barnes and Noble gift card. The answers can be found at the websites listed below:
Question #1 – My twitch is in which eye?
Question #2 – What does Zoey call Voss? Hint: Zarek’s Angels.
Question #3 – Who are the Tai-Kok? Hint: Vexing Voss Synopsis
Question #4 – On my Loose Id page what color is the male model’s hair?
Question #5 – What weapons does Zoey use to stop Voss?
Send the correct answers to email@example.com. The winner will be announced 10/15/13 on my Goodreads page.